Team Fein is back! Where to begin after a month hiatus... I think I will start with a general update on the kids and then go back and hit highlights (I know you all want to see Halloween photos).
At exactly 10 weeks old, Tucker slept through the night [insert chorus of singing angles here]. Although one night of sleep does not a sane mother make. He is now 12.5 weeks old and he has slept through the night for about two weeks straight. We're talking 10:30pm - 7:00am folks, so yes I am starting to regain a shred of sanity. It is such a change from Harrison, who I let eat and sleep on demand Le Leche League style, and I was rewarded with multiple middle of the night wake ups until he was nine months old; out of desperation we finally let him cry it out. For Tucker we are using the "Baby Wise" method and life has some structure and most importantly sleep for everyone in the family.
Tucker started smiling and cooing around 9 weeks; few things makes me as happy as his smiling little face, especially in the morning when his sleepy eyes open wide and shine as he greets me with a big, toothless smile.
Tucker has a very chill disposition and only cries when he is tired or uncomfortable, otherwise he will sit in his bouncy chair or kick back in his floor gym or just watch what is going on around him. Surprisingly he rarely takes a pacifier anymore, Harrison was probably 9 months when he kicked the habit.
Harrison loves his "Tuckey" and enjoys running ahead of me to Tucker's room so he can open the door, turn on the light, stand on his stool he leaves next to the crib, then lean in and detach the two velcro tabs that hold the swaddle in place. If Tucker is crying, Harrison will next pat him and reassure him that "it's alright Tuckey."
When I drop off and pick up Harrison at school, the eight other kids in class all meet us at the door and ask to see Tucker; they also know my rule is they may not touch him (oh the germs!). While the kids fawn over the baby, proud big brother, who is exempt from the no-touching policy, practically crawls into the car seat carrier and rubs cheeks with his little bro and gives him a little squeeze of love. Although he doesn't play with Tucker, some days when I put Tucker down for a nap Harrison will sigh and say, "I just miss my Tuckey."
Harrison's made a huge leap forward in his bike riding skills. When he was just over 2 years old we bought him a Strider balance bike, which is a light weight bike without pedals; the kiddo sits on the seat and push with their feet and learns to balance on a bike first. Harrison is the neighborhood all star on his Strider, zooming around faster than anyone can run next to him and whipping around corners.
Earlier this summer dad and Harrison bought a new peddle bike, however we had to put the training wheels back on because we realized he had trouble peddling the bike because he had never learned how to peddle in the first place! We borrowed a pink princess tricycle from friends but it was so small he could barely get it to move. So for the last few months dad has patiently taught him how to peddle, how to stand up for more force to push down on peddles to start or go up an incline, and also how to brake by pushing back on the peddles (with the Strider he would drag his feet on the ground, he wore holes into two pair of shoes!). On October 28th all their hard work and practice paid off!
In this video you will see our friend Gavin riding his Strider bike which should give you a good comparison.
Another step forward for Harrison, and for us as parents, is that he is settling in to life with a sibling. The first 8 weeks were rough. While Harrison was always sweet, gentle and loving to Tucker he acted out in unexpected ways to gain our attention. The biggest struggle was with sleep, which was already happening in the summer but got worse after Tucker was born. He refused to nap and wouldn't stay in his room for quiet time. He wouldn't stay in his room at bed time, he was begging to come out, keep his door open, turn on lights... I am ashamed to say that in our frustration (exasperated by lack of sleep and stress) we yelled at him often and locked him in a few times for a couple minutes; long enough for him to kick at the door, wail and throw breakable objects in his room. This was not our child and these mean people were not his parents.
Around week 8, I had life under a bit more control and was able to give Harrison more attention, letting the dirty dishes sit so I could play with him for a few minutes while Tucker was sleeping. We slowly worked out the bed time kinks and now he stays in his room when we say good night (usually).
An unintended issue developed after we left for the hospital while Harrison was asleep and woke to find us missing; Harrison suddenly became super attached and refused to go anywhere without us. He refused to play with friends at the park or even next door at Gavin's house unless one of us was with him. At bedtime, he would ask me questions and demand detailed answers about what I would be doing while he was in bed. If I said I would be in my bedroom, he would come out of his room to check that I was there. If I instead went downstairs to watch tv with dad, we would find him asleep on the floor upstairs in a corner where he can just barely see us sitting on the couch.
He never clearly expressed that he was afraid of abandonment but around week 10 we were all in the car when Harrison said, out of nowhere, "don't go to the hospital again and leave me while I am sleeping." We promised we wouldn't and that was it, he had nothing else to say on the matter.
Although he loves the Little Gym, he didn't want to go in "without" me because suddenly my seat behind the window just wasn't secure enough for him. Heck, I took Tucker into the bathroom to change a diaper during class, which entailed us walking through the gym in from of him, and he broke into a wailing, crying fit as if I had abandoned him.
Now he and I have a deal. Went we to four gym classes and he did not cry (or have any breakdowns) and he earned a Little Gym water bottle; he and I are so proud of his accomplishment. He is now working towards a Little Gym Frisbee. Hey, I'm not above bribery, whatever works! Still a little weary, he will check in with me and ask where I will be but he doesn't physically cling to me anymore.
A positive side effect of the baby is that Harrison and dad have formed a really tight bond since dad spent most of his free time with Harrison while I was recovering from the C-section and taking care of baby. Daily Harrison tells me he misses his daddy while he is at work and he was sad when dad left for three days for business in Salt Lake City. This weekend the two of them are together in Denver visiting friends and cheering on our beloved huskies at the game. Harrison was reluctant to go without me and Tucker but I hear he is having a great time there.
Whew, that was a long update, I didn't realize the progress that was made until I had to type it all out; I didn't even get to all the fun stuff we've been up to. Next post, I promise pictures at The Farm and Halloween.
